Valentine’s True Meaning: Everyone Can Celebrate, Plus Master Bedroom Feng Shui

A radio station fund-raiser reminds me of Valentine’s true meaning: They ask listeners to buy roses not only for your spouse or partner, but also for mothers, sisters, fathers, brothers, friends or someone who is going through a tough time. The original Saint Valentine is not celebrated as a great lover, but for his generosity. He anonymously gave dowry money to poor young women. Let’s reclaim Valentine’s true meaning as a time for generosity and gratitude.

Dump the Media Hype about What Valentine’s Day is Supposed to Be

The media and the marketers are working overtime to get us to spend money on “stuff” to enhance the romance we are supposed to constantly experience in our lives. Instead of using your money and time to shop for “stuff”, use your money and time to create and share an experience of joy. This is how you strengthen your relationships and create memories.

Attention: Relationship Nourishment

For those of you who have a spouse, partner or lover your most important gift is your undivided attention. Take time to show your appreciation of your beloved in simple and everyday ways:

• bring a cup of coffee or tea when you partner is busy with paperwork or relaxing with reading;
• surprise them with their favorite (fill in the blank) “just because”;
• ditch the kids and go out to dinner, a movie or for a walk together – just the two of you.

This is what keeps relationships going – simple and heart-felt thoughtfulness. Valentine’s true meaning enriches your entire year.

Don’t get stuck to one date – Feb 14th

You know your favorite restaurants are an un-romantic mob scene on Valentine’s day, and even the weekend before or after.
Give your sweetie a reminder on the 14th, with a note describing or hinting-at your real celebration on the date of your choice.

• No frantic search for a restaurant that will give you a reservation,
• No up-bidding to get a sitter,
• No spending more than you budgeted for flowers on Valentine’s Day because the wholesalers have your favorite florist in a strangle-hold.

Not in a Relationship

For those of us who are not in a relationship – by choice or by circumstances – now is the time to look around and recognize those people in your life who give you love in its many forms: mothers, fathers, brothers, sisters, and friends. You can send them a Valentine’s card or e-mail; or a “thinking of you” message or phone call. Remember the non-human beings who love you: your pets. When you move beyond the stereotypes of love you find you are richer than you thought. Reach out and connect with them in the spirit of Valentine’s true meaning.
Celebrate with a:

• Girls’ night out,
• Raucous girls’ night in, or
• a Potluck with friends and family.

Celebrate yourself

Media tells you that if you are not in a passionate relationship you have no worth. You are worthy of love; the love of others and the love of yourself. You are getting better and better with the passage of years and the accumulation of life experiences (even though it may not have felt like it at the time.) Treat yourself to a lovely meal or a day doing your favorite thing, with yourself as company.

Master Bedroom Feng Shui for Romance

The Ba-Gua Marriage/Romance/Partnership corner is the back right-hand third of your master bedroom.

• Declutter that area. Clutter will only clog this area and prevent Romance Chi flourishing.
• Add flowers or a plant, or
• Add a photo of the two of you
• If you are looking for romance then place “two-of” something with energy and joy in that area.

Master Bedroom Feng Shui for Yourself

If you are contentedly single the bedroom is the place where you can express yourself: you can be outrageously eccentric or make a very personal nest. Have uninhibited fun!

Support Valentine’s true meaning. Create a Master Bedroom that supports romance and supports you. Contact me or call 781-643-8697.

Furniture Arranging

Sometimes when I see photos of furnished rooms online I want to reach-in and re-arrange the furniture. Scroll down to see some examples of furniture rearranging for a living room posted online about ten years ago. Time to re-fresh the space and give this place a new life.

I love, love, love the rug, but the space is too small for the upholstered chair and ottoman. From a functional and Feng Shui point of view I am concerned about the sofa with it’s back to the french door, the outside, and beautiful views.
Partial Solution: Find another place for the upholstered chair and use the ottoman to create a faux chaise sofa end.

Here are some pictures of several ways to arrange the furniture in this small living room/TV room using the magic of software. (It’s OK to laugh at my squiggles, this is the best drawing I can do with a mouse.) My hope is these spark your own thinking about how your rooms are arranged.


There is no rule that says you have to arrange your room around your cable outlet. An extension cable will liberate you and your ideas.

Furniture Placement Before and Afters:

Version #1 After

To open up the room
a. Move the sofa against the far wall of the room, under the mirror.
b. Place the ottoman in front of one end of the sofa.
c. Add a floor lamp in the corner
d. Rotate the rug to align with the sofa.

Version #2 After

To make the most of your view outside
a. Move the sofa to the wall on the right opposite the french doors.
b. Add the ottoman to the arrangement
c. Move the TV and shelving unit to the wall under the mirror and center it. White extension cable will blend in with the white baseboard and give you more options for television placement.

Version #3 After

If looking at the television is the sole purpose of this space:
a. Center the television and shelves under the mirror
b. Move the sofa so the back of it is facing the entrance to this room
c. Position the ottoman in front of the sofa
d. Add a console table with lamp and decorative objects behind the sofa.

Version #4 After

If there are absolutely no other options for positioning the TV I would make these changes in the room.
a. The upholstered chair is too big for this small space. Get rid of it. Move the ottoman up against the sofa and create a faux chaise sofa end.
b. Place a console table behind the sofa with a lamp and decorative items such as a potted plant, framed photos and other personal treasures. This protects you from feeling exposed when sitting on the sofa.
c. Center the TV table on the wall.

And fine-tune placement of the small tile-topped table and the plant.

Each configuration has it’s pros and cons.

I hope this inspires you to get creative with how your rooms are arranged. Use your camera to think things out before your roll up your sleeves.

A Thought About the Wall Color

My guess is they wanted to match the red orange of the skirt in the poster on the wall. The color they picked at the box store looked great under the fluorescent lights, but when they painted it on their walls it showed itself in all its bright and bold glory.

Take-away: Always pick you paint colors in the room you are going to paint

Please share your thoughts on the furniture arrangements in the comments below. How would you do it differently?

Need help re-thinking the arrangement of your rooms? Want a fresh look to your home, using what you already own? Contact me for a personal consultation.

For most of us, the only time we think of our windows or window treatments is when they need to be cleaned. But your window treatments – curtains, shades, and blinds – have a strong effect of how your home or office looks and feels.

Last week I encountered window dilemmas twice, once as a problem and once as a wonderful but expensive solution.

First, while meeting with Feng Shui colleagues one of us shared a problem in helping a friend sell her house. We were talking about energy flow, ying and yang and other rarified Feng Shui concepts when she passed around photos. All of us exclaimed “The windows!” The windows of this home were covered with heavy curtains and valances. No wonder it wasn’t selling.

Second, in an article about Chip and Joanna Gaines of HGTV’s “Fixer Upper” they suggest “tearing down walls and installing bigger windows will make a space brighter, fast.” True, but few of us are able (or want to) to do this.

Why are Windows so Important?:

• Light is a form of energy – Chi energy.
• Windows are the way natural light enters your home.
• Nature Chi – the calming, balancing, energizing, healing qualities of Nature enter your home, along with your views of nature, through your windows.

Windows are your connection to the natural world.

4 Reasons Why You Need Window Treatments – Protection Against:

1. Sun glare
2. Cold
3. Ugly views.
4. Nosey neighbors

If none of these apply consider un-curtained or bare-naked windows.

A simple solution to both situations is the smart use of window treatments.

4 Ideas to Open Your Home to Light, Chi and Connection to Nature

1. Light and views are your aim: the simpler the window treatment the better.
2. Layer your window curtains. Sheers and lacy curtains give daytime privacy while letting in filtered light and views.
3. If your curtains are covering most of your window, blocking light and views, then re-hang your curtains. Hang your curtain rods from the wall, not the window frame. This allows you to go high and make the windows look taller. And go wide so the curtains can frame the window when open.
4. Eliminate or raise any valences or swags. Hang them from the wall above the window frames so the bottom edge of the valence touches the top edge of the window. This will both open your view and make the window look taller.

Note: If you have pets or kids use common sense about the length of your curtains.

Simple changes, the right ones, have a powerful impact on your home and you. Many of my clients have been amazed by the difference these simple changes in window treatments make in how their home looks and feels.

Contact me for help in re-thinking your window treatments and Feng Shui fine-tuning your house. Make it a home you truly love.

Learn more about window treatments.

Feng Shui can learn a few things from the Scandinavians.

How do people in Denmark, with their long dark winters survive and be ranked #1 in a global happiness survey (the US ranks #10)? Hygge!

Hygge (pronounced hYoo-guh) is hard to translate, but it means “coziness”, “enjoying the simple things of life with family and friends, or alone.” “Coziness” is not smallness, but a space that encourages comfort, connection and intimacy between people.

Food writer Mimi Sheraton rated “harmonious surroundings” as her #1 most memorable food experience:

Nordic lights. The pervasive effect of harmonious surroundings on the dining experience became apparent… when…[I] visited Scandinavia…. Lucky to be invited to dinners in several homes in Denmark and Sweden, I was introduced to the local custom of dinner by candlelight, the only illumination in the room throughout the meal. I was enchanted by the warm, sunny glow of candles on tables, mantels and wall sconces, casting flickering light on the impeccably prepared foods…The candlelight had a quieting effect as voices dropped to intimate levels and an almost spiritual aura pervaded the table, but fortunately not to the exclusion of the mischievous sardonic Nordic humor.”[emphasis mine] – Mimi Sheraton

Can you just picture this?

This tradition of candle-lit meals and gatherings is not limited to special occasions.

In feng shui we know that light is a form of energy and enhances chi. As one of the nine feng shui cures it is often used to energize a space or area of the ba-gua. A more subtle use of lighting is to calm energy, to draw people together in a space. Huyge does that.

Creating Hygge For A Client.

One of my clients told me up-front that she wanted hygge in her home. (She knew the word and what it meant!) We did various things with furniture placement that would create cozy spaces and encourage her family to hang-out together. But with several active children, candles where not an option. We chose a pendant lamp to hang above the family eating table. The light illuminates the table top, inviting family members to gather there where they eat, do crafts, games and homework. Not only does the pendant lamp illuminate the table top, but as they sit around the table their faces gently glow. Dimming the other lights in the room creates a calm atmosphere for meal times. She and her family love it. It is their favorite place in the house.

Candles are not just for romantic dinners.

Think of the feeling of connection and intimacy you experience as you sit around a campfire (without the smoke and mosquitoes) and a calm gathering point of light can do this for a room and for you.

Feng shui is about creating harmony between a space and your self. Fine-tuning the chi energy of the space to support your chi energy. Borrowing some ideas from the Danes and creating a space with hygge will influence how people feel. You can fine-tune the energy in your the space to support a feeling of harmony among family and friends.

Click to learn more about how to create a better meal time in your home.
See how improved furniture placement prevents “shouting distance”.

image by thskyt